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What are some funny and smart quotes?

Last Updated: 23.06.2025 03:43

What are some funny and smart quotes?

“The human brain can only operate as fast as its slowest brain cells. Too much alcohol kills brain cells, especially the slower, weaker ones. So, regular consumption of beer eliminates the slower brain cells after you’ve had a few beers which will speed up your brain.”

My sister Tracy sent me these a little while ago. I thought I’d share them. Thanks Trace.

Few people had funnier or smarter quotes than Cliff Clavin from the TV show, Cheers.

Why are flat Earthers made fun of when they seemingly don't exist? I have only met one flat Earther in 18 years.

“A Freudian slip is when you say one thing when you’re really thinking about a mother.”

“Everyone in the Swiss Army owns a Swiss Army knife. That’s why no one messes with Switzerland.”

“Ah just like all women. If they’re not turning down your proposal of marriage, they”re accusing you of suspicious behavior in the lingerie changing room.”

Why Sonics expansion talk could heat up this summer - The Seattle Times

“It’s a little known fact that pigs are the smartest animal. Scientists say that if pigs had thumbs and a language that they could be trained to do manual labor. They give you 20 to 30 years of loyal service and then at their retirement dinner, you can eat them.”

“It’s a little known fact that the tan became popular in the Bronze Age.”

“There is no rule against postal workers dating women. It just works out that way.”

Scientists warn that polar warming might alter ocean currents and cause massive flooding in the U.S. - Earth.com

They did a study between postal workers and chimpanze...